Why do we yearn for the "unattainable"?

Why do we yearn for the "unattainable"?
FtheNaysayers
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#11 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 5:03 AM:

Sduibek wrote:
Thanks!

EDIT: ...SEE?!?! I couldn't even just accept your gratitude for my response, I had to type out my most recent mental tangent. grin


It's all good. I enjoyed reading it. Well I'm off to bed it's 6 am. I really need to get my schedule back to going to bed at night instead of the morning. disapproval
Distortion
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#12 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 8:45 AM:

Why is gold so valuable? Because it's rare.

Why is platinum so valuable? Because it's rare.

Why are Ferrari's worth more than Civics? Because there are fewer Ferraris. (Read = it's more rare.)

The basic principle of scarcity is very fundamental to economics - and human thought in general. The more scarce something is, the more inherently desirable or valuable it must be, our subconscious tells us. Afterall, if something is rare it is in demand, and other people know what they are doing.

It's just basic human psychology - we inherently want that which is more of a challenge, that which is harder to attain and essentially that which is more valuable. On a conscious level, you might not agree with this, but it's true none the less, justifiable or not.

EVERYONE plays games, and if you think that you don't you're either fooling yourself or you're simply doomed - do you really think you'd be attracted to a girl that had no mystery, and just layed everything out for you? Well? smiling face Just try to enjoy them and keep the score balanced cool
Sduibek
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#13 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 8:56 AM:

Distortion wrote:
do you really think you'd be attracted to a girl that had no mystery, and just layed everything out for you? Well? smiling face

Yes. I value open-ness and communication in relationships. Although i could be misinterpretting you. wink

i can fathom how i might be fascinated by someone's little idiosyncracies that don't make sense to me, but i don't think that's what you're talking about.
Tripp2K3
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#14 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 2:33 PM:

A boy in a third world country has no motivation or need to gain the unatainable since he has never known that he can achieve the unatainable. Yet the same boy brought up in the civilised world will want to achieve the unatainable.

Maybe our desire to get more that is beter then our own, such as a biger TV, car, relationship etc.. is beceause of the constant unsated feelings that a person has in a consumerist state. We are tought from a young age that we must have better things and some how aspire to things that are beyond us and yes sometimes it works but ogften these thing would appear pointless to the subjective spectator. What I am trying to say is that as well as the natural idea of making youself better there is also the developmental aspect in or wn culture that is proving to be a detromental effect on the word.

Like that gas guzzling 4*4 that you know will do the same thing as the fiesta that you left in the back but you just feel better for having it.

Whilst the 3rd world child will feel happy with what he has beceause he has all that he thinks he needs and there is no drive for him to become better,

Or maybe I'm wrong and it's part of the inborn humen psyche and the reason why man made the hammer was for man to kill many more animals and become the top of the food chain, but then we're at the top now so what is the point of wanting more, at least we are alive.
vertigo
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#15 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 2:51 PM:

The question is so elementary it's surprising. We want what is difficult to get because we don't want to be outdone. When we see other people have better things than us, we have an urge to exceed that. Call it greed, or jealousy, or whatever you like.

We don't want the common girl that no-one likes. We want the popular one, because she is hard to get. If we succeed we can show her off, proving our worth. We don't want other people to think for some reason we aren't able to do better than second best.

A man wants a woman he can show off, a woman that will make other men envious. It's like our secret mission. Women want power, a powerful man they can control. The more power you show, the more attractive you are. Be a meek puppy and you get played around with or ignored.

Oh, and this idea of the 'new age man'? Please, he's nothing but a subservient slave, born to please a woman. No self-respecting man would stoop to that level.
Tripp2K3
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#16 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 4:41 PM:

vertigo wrote:
The question is so elementary it's surprising. We want what is difficult to get because we don't want to be outdone. When we see other people have better things than us, we have an urge to exceed that. Call it greed, or jealousy, or whatever you like.

We don't want the common girl that no-one likes. We want the popular one, because she is hard to get. If we succeed we can show her off, proving our worth. We don't want other people to think for some reason we aren't able to do better than second best.

A man wants a woman he can show off, a woman that will make other men envious. It's like our secret mission. Women want power, a powerful man they can control. The more power you show, the more attractive you are. Be a meek puppy and you get played around with or ignored.

Oh, and this idea of the 'new age man'? Please, he's nothing but a subservient slave, born to please a woman. No self-respecting man would stoop to that level.


Yes but I think the main question of WHY is more important. The simple answer of just beceause we can I don't think is enough. What we need to consider is why man has it apparently imbuilt into himself to exceed others or attain what is unatainable and revel in that challenge.

Why isn't man happy with that oh-so average girl, after all logicly all he needs is to reproduce and feel psychologically comftable (although made of many differant aspects). So the need to ahve that much more must be greed in part, which I think is due to social development when growing up, or something else. Maybe I'm going on a bit of a tangent here, I hope not.
Rachel
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#17 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 5:11 PM:

Again, I think it's a consequence of evolution. People subconsciously want to pass their genes on and they want to do so with someone with good genes. The other aspect of this is competition and that's an inherent part of survival.

I think people in third world countries want the unattainable. It's just on a different scale. There are many who want food and a home.

To a certain extent we also want what others have. A blind person likely wants to see, but imagine if everyone was blind and we had no understanding of the concept of sight. Would we aspire to see?
Casiopeia
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#18 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 6:24 PM:

Sduibek wrote:
Please. rolling eyes

I prefer to enjoy people's company and life itself rather than subscribe to cheap tricks and shallow mindgames. In fact, I refuse to respect people who play mindgames. It's a betrayal of a basic right, in my opinion. You should be allowed to completely be yourself in a relationship. Pardon me, but I can't be myself when someone is f*cking with me all the time.


I completely agree. I read the book because at that time someone said I must read it to find a new husband. That was AT LEAST four years ago. I couldn't bring myself to do what they said. I will comment on this one thing though...according to the person who referred it to me she knew of several friends who got married with the use of the strategies in the book. Makes you wonder why any man would fall for such blantant manipulations. The book basically advocates being the bitch of the century saying that men only want what they can't have so remain elusive enough that you make him obsessed with you and HAS to marry you. disapproval
In-voker
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#19 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 12, 2004 - 9:27 PM:

Distortion wrote:
EVERYONE do you really think you'd be attracted to a girl that had no mystery, and just layed everything out for you? Well? smiling face


raised eyebrow YES
Frank
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#20 - Quote - Permalink
Posted Jul 13, 2004 - 11:45 PM:

Casiopeia wrote:
I completely agree. I read the book because at that time someone said I must read it to find a new husband. That was AT LEAST four years ago. I couldn't bring myself to do what they said. I will comment on this one thing though...according to the person who referred it to me she knew of several friends who got married with the use of the strategies in the book. Makes you wonder why any man would fall for such blantant manipulations. The book basically advocates being the bitch of the century saying that men only want what they can't have so remain elusive enough that you make him obsessed with you and HAS to marry you. disapproval


I think its scary that people need strategies to get married. Getting married is not some kind of game show or big road rules challenge, it's just supposed to happen when the occasion is right.
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