Philosophy Forums


My personal statement.
Comments appriciated.

PrintPrint


Page: 1 2

My personal statement.
smerdyakov
Aspirant
Avatar

Usergroup: Members
Joined: Nov 23, 2008

Total Topics: 3
Total Posts: 25
Posted 10/27/09 - 06:14 PM:
quote post
#11
Do you know who reads your personal statement? If it's the philosophy department, then writing your personal statement like one used to apply to graduate school (examples can be googled) would probably impress them. These statements really only require your intended research/past research and why you think their department would be a good fit for you to continue that research. But if it's not the philosophy department (which I wouldn't think it would be for undergrad), the way you're going about it is probably fine. It would be more in line with a job application -- what can you offer them. At least I think that's how those go.
Why exist?
Initiate

Usergroup: Members
Joined: Oct 20, 2009

Total Topics: 5
Total Posts: 12
Posted 10/31/09 - 02:20 AM:
quote post
#12
GeorgeHawkins wrote:
This is the second draft of my personal statement for applying to university to do philosophy next year.

I really need to get this done this week since its a popular course so I could do to get my applications in soon.

Id really appriciate some comments.

---------------

I have an avid interest in philosophy. I have a particular interest in the philosophy of Nietzsche. Nietzsche developed the idea that hard times in life can actually be an advantage. That by overcoming problems and mastering oneself, one can become a greater than one could otherwise have been. I find this much more appealing than schools of thought which would simply try to make one see one’s problems as less bad, when they may not be less bad. Or ones that would say that none of it matters because life is eternal and that those who are poor and meek, such as failures, are in some way correct in being that way so should be content when contentment means they wont act to improve there situation. Although I think he meant more than just unhappiness being the motivation for improving ones situation. I think what he was getting at was also that in a person strong enough to endure hardship, that hardship can be a catalyst for greatness. In a similar way to the way in which the natural response of a plant growing in a strong wind would grow with a stronger stalk. The natural response of a strong person to great difficulties in life can be to become greater. Obviously the plants growing in the strongest winds would end up being the ones with the strongest stalks, or dead. Nietzsche was ill for most of his life, faced more hardship and pain than most and ended up as one of the greatest philosophers of his time so was in a very good position to understand this. Many consider thus spoke Zarathustra to be his greatest work and he wrote that shortly after one of the most painful episodes of his life.

I have exceptional reasoning skills and powers of debate. I enjoy arguing my positions on various issues and can discuss issues with people from all walks of life. I like discussing duelist philosophies and am highly critical of the reasoning behind the way in which they are traditionally presented. I really enjoy debating Nick Bostroms simulation argument and contributed some points about how post humans deciding weather or not to create simulations would create a paradoxical situation where in deciding to create simulations they would be greatly reducing the chances of them being real post humans. As post humans they would be in a position to decide weather or not post humans create simulations so by deciding not to they would greatly improve the chances of them being real rather than simulated.

I am currently studying an access to higher education in social sciences diploma. In addition to this, I am studying the Japanese language, Kendo and pottery. I enjoy gardening and am doing the pottery course in order to learn to make my own bonsai dishes. I have been growing lots of bonsai trees since deciding to go to University in order to sell over the Internet to supplement my student income.

In the past I've worked for a Pirtek which is a hydraulics company a job I had to leave due to an allergy. Prior to starting my course I worked as a self employed gardener, which I enjoyed. I have done a great deal of gardening as it was an interest I got from my grandparents at a young age. I prefer the wild plant to the cultivar. I like to cultivate wildness. My way of gardening is to emulate nature. Although with bonsai I have broken from emulating nature in the sense of recreating natures conditions as they require a good deal of direct cultivation. However in creating a windswept style bonsai one is emulating the effect that growing in a small crack on a windy cliff side and age would have on the appearance of a tree.

I would urge you to offer me a place at your university. I belive I have what it takes to be a successful student of philosophy. I think its a field in which I could apply my powers of reasoning and understanding. I am well organized, motivated and determined to fulfill my potential and make what I can of myself. I can assure you that I would work hard to make the most of any opportunity that you might give me.


Mate, have you herd of "turn it in?" Plagiarism detector that searches the web for to see if you have copied statements online. You've just posted yours online in a public forum. Other could take it or you could be acused of plagiarism.

Go here - http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/forumdisplay.php?f=134

A private forum which checks your statement for free. Its done by university students so they don't need your statement. They review hundreds of statements and know what they are talking about.

Also, I'd take your personal statement off the public domain if I were you.
Download thread as

Page: 1 2



Sorry, you don't have permission to post. Log in, or register if you haven't yet.